Sunday, December 5, 2010

I wish

I have some I wishes but I think of them not in a way that makes me pine for them and end up disappointed but because I never want to stop having wishes.  Here are some current ones:

I wish I lived on the beach.  I have these visions of taking my boy for sunset picnics, letting the tide chase our bare feet as we clumsily run through the sand.  I love salty air and afternoon rainstorms, sunburned cheeks, and fuzzy horizons.  Oh, to live at the beach!

I wish for an activity that reminds me that I am young and maybe even makes me feel like a kid.  I am thinking dance or tae-kwon-do, or some random sport in which I would annoy my fellow teammates because I would never in a million years take it seriously.  I have settled for afternoon dance sessions with Silas.  As it nears the evening, after his afternoon nap and the sun is setting and we are waiting for daddy's 5:01 call, we turn up the music and dance.  Oh, I love to dance and it is so much sweeter when baby giggles compete with my exaggerated singing. 

I wish for my own home.  I want to decorate with baby toys and litter my yard with leaf piles and a kiddie pool.  I want a swing set and a mailbox and quiet mornings.  I want to wake before everyone else and sit in the dark and know that I am where I belong.  I miss that feeling of being home more than I can put into words.  I want Silas to know what his home will be like forever.  This is not do-able at the moment but I know in time we will get there.

I wish for a second car.  I long for spontaneity and having to make a trip to Nash Road to drop Wade to work with a sleepy baby screaming in the backseat then back to Cape then back down at lunch then back home then back to work, home, back to work at the end of the day then home makes a trip to the park seem a lot less worth it.  I really want trips to the park, library, museum, riverfront and many other places to be a part of our daily lives but with all the extra driving involved we just end up sitting at home bored most days.

These are my wishes for now.  Are you listening, Santa?

1 comment:

  1. You know...I think it's healthy to have wishes/dreams...even if you know that maybe some may not happen.

    I wish for a two week trip to Ireland and Scotland

    I wish we had a big one story ranch style home that Elizabeth would have all kinds of room to just zip back and forth in her electric chair.

    I wish I could visit NYC during Thanksgiving and for the week following it.

    I know that the possibilities of any of those happen are pretty slim but when I do day-dream about them it is relaxing and just a big ol' destresser!